오늘은 엄마가 기분이 너무 안좋아서 그동안 끊었던 맥주를 한잔 하고 있어ㅋ 니가 온다면 맥주도 커피도 밀가루도 다 끊을수 있는데ㅎㅎㅎ언제가 될지 기약없는 기다림이 엄마를 자꾸만 초조하게 하는구나ㅠ

엄마는 오늘 친한 언니의 산후조리원에 다녀왔어 다른 아이엄마와 함께..... 나만 혼자 아이엄마가 아니란 생각에 가기 전부터 기분이 좋지 않았지만 친하기도 하고 또 좋은 사람들이니까~하고 마음을 다독였지 근데 갔다오니까 너무 힘드네ㅠ 아기가 없으니 대화 주제에도 소외되기 일쑤고 그들이 엄마 눈치를 보고 다른사람들의 임신소식도 들려주지 않더구나......

둘째를 묻는 내 질문에 여름쯤 가져서 봄에 낳고싶다는 그 말....아무렇지 않게 들었는데 계속 생각할수록 엄마 마음이 너무 아픈거야.... 엄마는 너를 이렇게 오랫동안 기다는데....대출까지 내가면서 너를 빨리 만나려고 병원도 다니고이렇게 노력하는데  그게 누군가에게는 너무나 쉬운 일인것 같아서ㅋㅋ아~엄마도 너를 계획해서 만나고 싶다ㅋ

엄마는 너 하나만 바라는데ㅋ 너는 어디쯤 와있는거니?
예쁜 우리 아가야~  이제 그만 엄마 속썩이고 엄마곁에 와주라 엄마도 아빠도 너무나 기다리고 있어.......